If you’ve got housemates, live in student halls, or worse still, ended up back at your parents’ place for lockdown, then discretion is going to be a top priority when choosing a sex toy.
Unfortunately you might have to rule out the old faithful Rampant Rabbit or Hitachi Wand powerhouse. But fear not, some top adult toy brands are producing virtually silent devices that are more than capable of getting the job done!
Usually, we tend to stick to remote control toys here at RemoteFun HQ – the clue’s in the name. However, when something catches our eye, we’re not averse to experimenting with a few non-remote devices when they fit the bill, as they have done today. So let’s have a look at some of the best discrete pleasure options out there…
LELO Mia 2 Rechargeable Bullet Vibrator
If you’re RemoteFun regular, you’ll know that LELO is one of our favourite brands – the Mia 2 is no exception. Discretion and elegance are what this little bullet does best. It’s curvaceous purple form is designed to hide in plain sight, and at 4.5-inch it’s small enough to slip into a handbag.
The ultra-quiet motor still packs a punch with 6 vibration modes, and double the power of the original Mia model. No need for charging cables as a quick twist reveals a built-in USB charging port giving up to 90minutes per charge. All of this comes with the usual understated quality you’d expect from LELO, and is completely waterproof. A solid addition to every self-respecting lady’s toy collection.
Price: £68.99 (correct at time of writing)
Lovehoney Silencer Whisper Quiet Classic 7 Inch Vibrator
We tend to be pretty tech focused here at RemoteFun, but sometimes, the tried and tested classics are what you need.
There’s not really much we can say about this one – it’s all in the name. It’s 7 inch of battery powered, virtually silent, pleasure. Even if the only place you can get some privacy is in the shower – it’s got you covered – the vibrator is 100% waterproof.
Price: £19.99 (correct at time of writing)
Womanizer X Lovehoney Pro40 Rechargeable Clitoral Stimulator
We’ve heard a lot of good (a serious understatement) things about clitoral stimulators recently, so we thought it was only fair that we hunt down the best one we could find.
The Pro40 collaboration between Womanizer and Lovehoney might not be the sort of sex toy you’re used to, but if you’ve not tried a clitoral stimulator before, you REALLY need to give it a go. This palm sized tool delivers some serious results – and by results, we mean orgasms.
If the reviews are to be believed, it seems that the Pro40 could be responsible for more first time squirting than the Thames Water apprentice scheme. Don’t say we didn’t warn you.
With regard to how discrete the Pro40 is – some of the highest modes do start to produce a bit more volume, but they’re still relatively quiet. Plus, if you’ve got it cranked up that high, keeping your groaning in check will probably be more of an issue!
Price: £99.99 (correct at time of writing)
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